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A friend of mine called me this morning and told me that this morning she saw my 15 year old son in CVS while he was on the way to school (he was with a friend of his) and my son and his friend were buying condoms. What do I do? Do I tell DH? Should I tell the other mother? Should I confront DS when he gets home? Do you think he's going to have sex after school and track practice?
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tell dh and also talk to your ds about being safe (which apparently he already knows)
[ Reply | Options ]1. take a deep breath. 2. kids have sex at that age. sounds like your son is being responsible and using condoms. 3. dh should have a talk with your son about responsible sexuality, but NOT reveal that he was seen buying condoms. there is nothing wrong imo in what he was doing; he deserves his privacy.
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First of all, don't freak out on him--lots and lots of teenage boys buy condoms to feel as though they MIGHT get laid. When I was in hs, every boy had them--didn't mean they used them. Does he have a girlfriend?
[ Reply | Options ]Yes he has a girlfriend....a nice girl, I would never have expected them to be having sex though.
[ Reply | Options ]I hope he's not pressuring her too much. I bet he is, considering he and his friend are buying them together. Everyone here is talking about him being sexually responsible, but it's the emotional stuff that really f&cks up teen girls/
[ Reply | Options ]I would be surprised if he was pressuring her, just based on his personality. But of course anything is possible. I mean when I met DH he was the one who wanted to have sex first and was more for early sex than me. DH would have had it on the 2nd date and I made him wait till the 5th.
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one you don't know that he's having sex, I knew a lot of guys who bought and carried (and sold!!!) condoms to look cool. if he is having sex, he's being safe. talk to your child. tell him about the ramifications of sex, how it changes relationships, but how you are happy he is being safe. and before you think I'm living in fantasy land, I have a 13 year old son, so we have these conversations often.
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This is a teachable moment. 15 year olds sometimes do have sex. He may or may not be, but he is obviously thinking about it. have a non-judgemental talk with him. NOT a confrontation. And yes, I think you should tell the other mother, if you know her.
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You think she should tell the girlfriend's mother or the other boy's mother? Don't tell the girlfriend's mother--it's entirely likely that he and the girl haven't gotten even close to that far (yet) and he's just being cautious or showing off for his friend. Telling the other boy's mother is a little less ridiculous, but still nosy behavior imho
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these responses fascinate me bec my impression of ub is that the crowd is adamant that high school kids shd practice abstinence. have seen people flamed so many times for just saying that they don't condemn their dcs having hs sex. most of all, I am wondering how different the answers would be if op's dc were a girl.
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